No one knows where I buried my sweet Virginia Madison

My life is absurd. I had a hell of a weekend, waking up on two couches that were not my own, fully clothed. I also went snowboarding, which was great. I didn’t have enough money to make rent, but I did all this anyways. Thinking that I should settle down for the week, I find out that Tuesday is Bourassa’s birthday, and that as a friend I should go out for that. Get home at 1 last night, to sleep for 5 hours before heading off to work. Now I should have a lull prior to Scott Megaffin’s going away drinks on Friday. I could always not drink, but then I feel like I would be letting him down. I also feel like I would be letting down Rob if I didn’t drink at the Deuce-Deuce. I have no idea what I am trying to prove or accomplish with this, but it appears my entire personality has devolved into me getting drunk. I don’t get it.

I would say that part of it is being in Calgary. Here I don’t have access to the same things I did in Saskatoon. I can’t just hop in a car and head out to do something, as I have no car. I can’t go to shows unless Mark is in town, because I have no one else to go with (and even at that most of the shows I want to check out here and not Mark’s cup of tea. Our Common Struggle is playing on Thursday, and I hear good things about them, plus they are street punk. Just awesome). I am trying my damndest to think of how I can once again become a multi-faceted person, but I can’t do it. I don’t even have the proper gear to get my bike road-worthy here. It sucks.

So here I end up, sitting at work writing the whiniest blog post ever. This could be the result of serious lack of sleep, or the rank fast food I had for lunch, but whatever. I think the point of this post was that I am pumped to be going back to Saskatoon. I’ll leave on that note.

Brush my shoulder and I pop my collar...

… cos I'm worth a million, gazillion, fofillion dollars.

Actually I am about $5K in the hole right now, but I don't care too much about that. As long as I'm not getting menacing phone calls from dudes named Tiny I think I should be alright. In case anyone was wondering where my spectacular blog title came from (as everyone was, because they are so damned entertaining) it's off the new Ludacris album "The Red Light District". Now before anyone jumps on me for listening to Luda, I would like to point out that THE Leo Shia, DJ extraordinaire, has cited the last Ludacris show in T-dot as the best show he has ever been to. We are talking about a kid who goes to hip-hop shows to survive. He has seen the Alkoholiks, Mos Def and Talib Kweli (together!), Dizzee Rascal, Jay-Z, every rapper to ever come out of Toronto, Gangstarr, Nas, and the list goes on. And he still says Luda was the best. To me that has some weight, and I honestly think that after listening to this album one can figure out why his show was so good.

If I were forced to characterize this music I would call it cartoon rap. Luda uses so much inflection and has such charisma on the mic that he may be one of the best rapper's today. I love this shit.

Enough fanboi bullshit and on to the gritty stuff. Last night we had another Christmas party for work (gritty!). This was for my counselling partner, Dave Connolly, and all the rest of his counselees, I would say 20-25 people in total. To start we went bowling (super gritty!), always an entertaining activity. Awards go to John Simmons for Best Body English, Lida Fridjwhatever for Most Awkward Husband, and my manager Joe Lai for Timeliest Entrance/Best Burn of the Evening. To get the best burn you must know that Evan and I get put on a lot of jobs together, and people like to joke that we are a little too close. So Joe shows up at the bowling alley right as everyone is leaving, remarks that he is right on time, and then says to me "Justin, I thought everyone was bringing their spouses, so where is Evan?" This may be funnier if you knew Joe (a small workaholic from Singapore), but I still think it is good. After Bowling we went to the Dave's house (ridiculously gritty!), where his awesome wife Nancy had some of the best appetizers I have ever experienced. That lady kicks ass. We mingled and lost at pool for a while, prior to a mountain of chinese food arriving (I am on my way to eat leftovers that we brought to the office last night). It was a good night, and there were lots of borderline inappropriate jokes made in the presence of a partner. That is always a great time.

Now I am at work trying to track down the last few pieces of information I need to finish this section so I am out. Word on the street has it that tonight is bourbon night. Just a heads up.

In this life one thing counts, in the bank large amounts

I called in sick from work today. I would have to say this was an awesome idea cos I am already in the not-so-hot books, but I had a beauty of a fever when I woke up and I thought spending the day in bed might be a good way to prevent becoming full-blown ill. I can’t tell if I am feeling better yet because I am doped up on random medicinal products. I guess I will find out tomorrow if this actually helped.

It’s shitty having to be sick from a job like this. Back when I worked at Dutch Grower’s, or even back at McDonald’s, I could have cared less about showing up for work. I knew that they would be able to pull someone else in no problem, or if they didn’t the lack of my presence would not have a large effect. At E&Y if I don’t show up it just means my work doesn’t get done. This either leaves me to do it later, or piles it on someone else. Now, I don’t mind having to pick up my own slack but I feel like a shithead for leaving my work for other people to do. The shitty conditions we work under fosters a camaraderie where you know the other guy has it as bad as you, so you don’t want to dump your work on him. It sucks, but today I really just didn’t have a choice. Danielle’s mom is in town and she even confirmed that I was sick. Moms are more reliable than doctors for sure.

So I spent the first part of today firing off e-mails to get stuff set up for me to do tomorrow. Then I played video games. Lots of video games. I also made some KD and really that is all I did. Fun stuff.

I have another work Christmas party on Thursday. I am hoping Evan once again drinks more than his share because that is simply awesome/infrequent. Maybe I will have good stories to write after that. If not I plan on heading up to the mountains this weekend, and something should come from that.

It's the only way we know how to rock

After causing a veritable commenting melee by way of my last post, I thought I should bore the crap out of people with random worthless commentary (plus Mike and Evan did it). It's for your own good, and nothing appears to kill conversation like pointing out inane shit.

- I wonder if anyone noticed that this blog's title and one a little while ago were both from Usher's "My Boo"? Also, if anyone did would they be willing to admit it? At this point in time there is really no need to front on Usher's skills. Through early morning viewing of MuchMoreMusic I have ascertained that he is the first artist to hold #1 on the billboard charts for over one half of one year. Think about it.

- Is it ridiculous that I continue to think that I am rich every time we get paid only to run out of money one week later? I feel that I should be learning from this experience, but I can't help feeling like I have way too much money. Perhaps this comes from a lifetime of infrequent work and less frequent money. That is not to say I was poor, but I am willing to admit that I have never had at a single point in time over $2000 in the bank. I recognize that this is pathetic, but it's the only way I know how to rock. Heh.

- My work for the next 2 days is going to be boring. People say that you don't learn anything at big clients, but I have found that I would much rather not learn things, and work in a sweet audit room, then be stuffed in a shitty office trying to figure issues out while supposedly learning.

- The UFE marks come out on Friday. I do have to say that I would be fucking dying inside waiting to find out if I passed the test that will determine my immediate future. For a lot of these people passing the UFE means they can finally leave the shitty job they currently have to one where their boss doesn’t feel the need to open the Christmas party with an apology for working them to death. That is a big deal and I can't wait to see how demolished people get that night. If we are going in order, than this would be Evan's turn to get annihilated and do something ridiculous. (For those who haven't been keeping score: I got kicked out of a bar during recruiting, Rob is holding it down ridiculously in Saskatoon, and Bourassa punched Jon White at the Christmas party). If Evan is looking for a drink I recommend either turkey and cran, or turkey and ginger as they are equally deadly.

- I still suck at Halo, but I am slowly trying to improve. I am really hoping that we can hijack someone’s box over Christmas and play through the single player on co-op. That would be spectacular.

I really have nothing else to say, if I ever actually did.

Keep it right.